Day 35 Wednesday
As I arrive home from work today, the
girls' are obviously excited about going home today. Their Mum packs up most of
the stuff and the door closes behind them.
I still have mixed emotions. It's a relief
that the house is so quiet but I can’t help wonder what their life will be like
at home. Would they be better off with me in the long term?
I still feel angry and as if I’ve been used and treated like shit.
When I got that call 35 days ago, I swung into action to sort her house out and
make it a home for the children, whilst my sister did nothing except carry on
as normal. She went on her trips while I spent my weekends there clearing
rubbish and crap from the house.
Am I stupid? I feel like a prize idiot and have been well and truly
used.
It’s nice not have to go up and down the stairs every five minutes
as the girls mess about at bedtime, but I can’t settle and I’m restless as I sit
on the sofa trying to relax in front of the television. And later I find it
hard to sleep.
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